5 movie robots we can all relate to written by daroff on 06/12/07
i love robots so much. the concept is so simple: take a shiny puppet/animatron/cartoon, give it human-like attributes and an inner desire to find his or humanity. everyone loves c3p0, lieutenant commander data, and the far more masculine terminator. however, the silver-panelled screen is filled with a lot more mechanical friends than just luke’s tag-alongs and humans in chrome make-up.
here are 5 movie robots that made us laugh and cry, because — god damn it! — they’re so… human?
5) max (flight of the navigator):
he’s a robot ship from another planet, voiced by pee wee herman. when i was a kid, this movie blew my mind. he can travel across the universe at the speed of light, but he understands the world about as well as i did when i was young. all i could see of max was a shining eye at the end of a robo-arm, but that was all i needed to identify with his journey of discovery.
4) the iron giant (the iron giant):
close your eyes. take whatever it is you don’t like about yourself and imagine it’s a giant laser attached to the end of your arm that will destroy everything around you if threatened. now imagine you find someone that really loves you, that can teach you that you are strong enough to overcome anything, even your own inner being. nothing about you is set in stone and there’s nothing about you that you don’t have the power to change. and you’re voiced by vin diesel.
3) robot bartender (the fifth element):
i’m serious about this one. i used to clean theatres. the mess after a spy kids movie is absolutely unbearable, and it’s compounded by the fact that every cup, every kernel of popcorn is accompanied by the feeling that your job would be just a little easier if only people would be a bit more considerate. the robot bartender from the fifth element made me realize the importance of simply being an efficient worker. after putting the fragile key to saving the universe on an intergalactic transport with your severely under-trained apprentice, what you really need is a stiff drink, and someone to offer you another while he attentively listens to your problems. i could have belly ached about scrubbing floors, but when you go to see a movie to watch a priest put the fragile key to saving the universe on an intergalactic transport with his severely under-trained apprentice, all you want is the area under your seat to be clean.
2) optimus prime (the transformers):
kids love trucks. kids love robots. kids love america. kids love trucks that transform into america loving robots. this guy was tailor made to inspire kids around the world to love america and buy toys. and he’s apparently jewish. he taught me autobots stick together, and as soon as i realized that was a metaphor that extended to my family and friends, it made me a better person.
1) johnny 5 (short circuit 1 & 2):
his character is entirely based on pop culture. he watches tv and movies, listens to music, and reads books then uses them to form his view of the world. he’s just like me, but he has a laser on his back. number 5 taught me the only way to stop evil robots is to reprogram them to act like the three stooges. and that was the greatest lesson of all.
who are some other movie robots that tug on your heart strings?
filed under movies: 80s, movies: 90's
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Omega II Jun 21
I own all but Short Circuit 2 and The Iron Giant on DVD.