my relationship with the vengaboys began my lifelong love affair with ironic music. i knew what irony was before the vengaboys, and i knew the examples of irony in “ironic” by alanis morissette weren’t ironic, which made the song amazingly ironic, but the first time i fell into deeply ironic love with a song was with the vengaboys’ “boom boom boom boom.”

i first heard this song, about a girl who has sex with a guy just to cheer him up, in a dance party thrown at a catholic church (x100 irony points). i loved the beat, and i hated how stupid the lyrics were, though i appreciated how amazing it would be if any girl would put out like the singer apparently did in real life. my immediate love and hatred for the song shot it straight to #1 on my “billboard top 40 songs i don’t really like” countdown.

but this love affair was not destined to last.

for one, i wrote an amateur parody version of “boom boom boom boom” (about a mafia man, so the “booms” were like the booms from a gun… groan…), which ended up on new zealand radio. long story short, apparently the vengaboys heard it on their world tour and really liked it. now they weren’t just this idiotic slutty european dance band (hilarious), they were an idiotic slutty european dance band who had heard of me (awkward).

the other problem was that another one of their songs, “we like to party,” was being used in a series of commercially ironic six flags commercials. you know how funny old t-shirts you find at the goodwill are awesome, but “funny” “vintage” t-shirts you see at abercrombie and fitch are terrible (and often racist)? that’s what this was like. everyone was enjoying the vengaboys ironically, but i thought i was the only one. it broke my heart, and i’m saying that with a lot of irony.

i’ve patched up my differences with “boom boom boom boom,” and i still “enjoy” the song from time to time. it’s sad though, cause when we first met, it was like like love at first sight… except we weren’t in love, and the song sucks balls.

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