the fine minds who brought us “i’m the juggernaut, bitch” give us their view on this subject

today’s friday, and you know what that means? time to deposit my check. standing in the deposit only line, i noticed a face from my past standing behind me. it was none other than walter jones, the original black ranger.

immediately, my mind went a-flutter. this wasn’t some totally out of reach super celebrity. it was the fucking black ranger. there is no possible way this guy could have an attitude about being recognized, especially by a genuine fan like myself. i wouldn’t mock him, or even draw attention to him. i would just tell him i thought he and his show were awesome. i wouldn’t even mention he was my second least favorite ranger after the asian chick.

it then occured to me i am way too sarcastic of a person to sound anything close to genuine in this situation. panic sunk in. what would i say? how would i say it? should i say anything? i had already done a couple casual looks behind me just to double check it was, in fact, him. did he notice? oh god, did he think i was eyeing him because he was a black guy in a bank?

i couldn’t make eye contact, which only made it worse. oh god, he must have thought i was actively avoiding looking at him. i was, but that’s beside the point. there is no possible way he could have not been thinking about racism. just look at the show he was on. the black guy was black. the asian was yellow. the nerd was blue.

he spent three and a half seasons on the most racially insensitive kids show of all time, and now some fucking cracker was glancing over his shoulder and not looking at him.

if you’re reading this, walter jones, i am so so sorry i made you feel so awkward. please for the love of shaft forgive me.

PS—you think no one thinks about the power rangers and race, watch this.

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