growing up next to haverhill, massachusetts (which, oddly enough, i now call my home), i was more thoroughly exposed to the world of archie comics than most (for those why might not be in the know, archie and the riverdale gang were originally based in a fictional mock-up of haverhill).

geographic predilections, however, weren’t enough to spark any interest in archie. why read about the love triangle between archie, betty and veronica when I can watch the shitshow between cyclops, wolverine and jean grey? it all changed when I popped into radio shack one day and came across something that DID spark my interest:

a FREE COMIC BOOK.

what was this 4 color wonder? that’s right, it was archie’s ham radio adventure, which showed us how nerds worldwide got in touch with one another before the proliferation of the internet. Wow! Imagine my astonishment: expensive radio equipment, complicated electronic schematics, and all for a radio that is expressly forbidden from playing music!

if my memory serves correctly, archie and his friends use the power of ham radio to stop a jewel thief, save twins from falling over a waterfall, and…i don’t know, something happened with a veronica’s viking ship and ham radio helped them avert catastrophe somehow. Oh, and I think Jughead did something stupid and they made fun of him over ham radio.

i flew through the 24 pages of non-stop informative excitement, and was suprised by how much i’d learned; specifically: i didn’t just not care about archie comics, i fucking HATED archie comics.