these young masterminds have created, in reality, that wonderful world i’d always dreamed of.

in my old suburban neighborhood, you’d get the occasional bike rider, roller-blader, or some crazy fuck with a skip it…

but never - never - had i been chased by a tornado or by death himself. and that’s a shame. this game made me want to be a paperboy. i would’ve painted all my customers’ houses white and the rest red, i would’ve done as many of those damned training courses with the cones, the spiked walls, and the propped up hemorrhoid donut cushions as i had to, and i would’ve even maneuvered around the belligerently insane go-cart drivers ripping down the perpendicular streets. well, we can all dream…

extra, extra: the paperboy is my hero, and he delivers the only news that’s better than Huey Lewis’ band.