in the summer of 1988, i had few greater concerns than jason voorhees killing me in my bed, and it was all thanks to this fucking game.

the cryptic, threatening messages, the creepy music, the body count of children, it’s all too much. god knows i could never get far enough to get any decent weapons either, so they have you lobbing pebbles at jason while he cuts you down, camper by camper. also, he knows i tried to kill him with pebbles. turning off the nintendo can only do so much to protect you.

it’s a good thing i never beat the game, because if i would have seen that ‘he’s not really dead’ message, i’d be institutionalized to this day.

sick bastards.